Why a Healthy Marriage Can Give You Wings to Fly
One of the most common and debilitating fears among my female clients and e-course members is that marriage means the death of their freedom and independence. While marriage certainly requires a death...
View ArticleWhat Does it Really Mean to Be In Love?
Because the only love I experienced before being with A was the ‘unrequited love’ type, I can feel that I have something missing with him. I am not in pain with him, I do not think about him every...
View ArticleToo Close for Sex?
“This may sound strange, but sometimes I wish my partner were less available. More of a jerk sometimes, even. Not so willing to and ready to connect all the time. I guess I wish he would let me come to...
View ArticleWhen You Feel Irritated with Your Partner
“He irritates me all the time. How can he be a good match if I’m constantly annoyed?” “At first things were great with my girlfriend and everything flowed smoothly between us. But now all she has to...
View ArticleDealing with Disappointment
The theme of disappointment emerged last week in my sessions with clients. Some were disappointed by the reality that there’s no such thing as a perfect relationship. Others became aware of how scared...
View ArticleLove is Not the Absence of Fear
Love is not the absence of fear. Like joy and sadness, love and fear are dualities that live in the same chamber of the heart. When we love another deeply, fear will rear its head. Designed to protect...
View ArticleWhat if I Learn to Trust Myself and Then…?
Oh, the what-ifs… I’ve received dozens of emails this past week inquiring about my upcoming Trust Yourself program with the same question: “What if I learn to trust myself and then I realize that my...
View ArticleLove is a Practice
We have an idea in this culture that you either have it or you don’t: You’re athletic or you’re clumsy; you’re a great orator or you stumble over words; you’re talented artistically or you can barely...
View ArticleIt’s Not What You Think
One the many problems of living in an image-based, superficial culture is that we learn to take life at face value. You have a dream about having sex with someone other than your partner and you latch...
View ArticleWhen Fear Meets Love
When fear pricks the heart it flies in the face of every message about love we absorb from the culture: that love should provide a safe haven against the storms of life; that love should be easy; that...
View ArticleAnxiety: A Doorway to the Underworld
We live in a culture that chases the light. We worship the happy face and plaster on smiles when we venture into the world. Smiley babies statistically receive more praise than fussy babies, and bubbly...
View ArticleThe Risk of Living and Loving
On our way home from a lovely Christmas day with my family who lives about an hour away from us it started to snow. At first it was a wet sleet, but within a few minutes it thickened to a snow storm,...
View ArticleLove Cannot Be Measured
Love cannot be measured. It cannot be placed in test tubes in a science laboratory or placed on the great scale of life to determine whether or not there’s enough. The anxious/sensitive mind longs for...
View ArticleA Manual for Love
I wish I had been given one. I wish we all had been handed a Love Manual in a class in high school, and taken levels two and three in college. For there are basic laws and practices we could have...
View ArticleI Feel Like I’m Lying When I Say I Love You
These are statements I hear quite often in my practice: I feel like I’m lying when I say I love you to my partner. I feel like a fake, an imposter, like I’m leading him/her on. If I don’t feel love,...
View ArticleThe Witching Hour
photo by Dona Laurita I had a chuckle at myself a couple of months ago. I had been mentioning the 3-4 am witching hour – the time when many people wake up overtaken by panic or anxiety - in my blog...
View ArticleThe Fear of Feeling Too Good
My third round of Trust Yourself: A 30 day program to help you overcome your fear of failure, caring what others think, perfectionism, difficulty making decisions, and self-doubt is open for...
View ArticleLonging for Aliveness
It’s often during this time of year in the Northern hemisphere, when the entire natural world is quivering with a restlessness to birth itself anew, when the animals are shaking the last snowflakes off...
View ArticleIn Love with the Feeling of Being In Love
A term appeared on my e-course forum several years ago: infatuation junkie. Forum members were using it to describe the phenomena of chasing after the feeling that arises during the infatuation stage...
View ArticleThe Joy of Loving Freely
I write a lot about the power of fear and the work of relationships. I write about this to help people learn about the tricky ways that fear manifests in intimate relationships, which helps them to...
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